Kid Temper Tantrum Hates HomePod
Leland gets off the school bus and enters the house. Glizzy Hella Geekin is being blasted through the living room Leland: What is that? Dad: That's HomePod! It's a half speaker and half-person assistant. Yeagar: It's $350, but it's quite impressive for it's price! Leland: Well let me try! Hey Siri! Play KEKE! Siri: Playing KEKE on Spotify. The music switches to KEKE Leland: Woah! How does the audio get so good? Dad: Well HomePod combines Apple-engineered audio technology and advanced software to deliver the highest-fidelity sound throughout the room, anywhere it’s placed. It also has a deep bass, 7 tweeters, and the A8 chip. Yeagar: Your reading that from the website! Dad: No I'm not! Leland: Well it does use Siri, right? Dad: We heard you say "Hey Siri". So of course it works! Yeagar: Also, where's Leanna? Leland: She's going to her friends house. Dad: Oh. Yeagar: Ask Siri something. Leland: Hey Siri! What's the weather in Salt Lake City? Siri: In Salt Lake City, it is currently 45 degrees Fahrenheit with a high chance of snow tonight. Leland: That's so cool! What else can it do? Dad: I got one! Hey Siri! How tall is Donald Trump? Siri: Donald Trump's height is 6′ 3″. Yeagar: Here's another! Hey Siri! Who won the Super Bowl VII? Siri: The Miami Dolphins beat the Washington Redskins by 14-7. Leland: I got another! Hey Siri! What do you think about Google Home? Siri: Her family is crazy! The Mini is too kawaii, the Max is too tough, and the one in-between is unknown! Dad: I didn't expect that! Leland: Hey Siri! What do you think about Amazon Alexa? Siri: She is a b****! She laid off Hime and RiceGum just for some cash! Yeagar: Damn! Leland: Hey Siri! Are you connected to the FBI? Siri: N-no I'm not! Baka! Leland: Hey Siri! Do you have a hidden camera? Siri: Why are you asking me those questions? I'm not spying on anyone! Dad: Leland you might wanna stop now. Leland: No! Hey Siri! Are you recording our words? Siri: NO I'M NOT!!! Yeagar: She's getting mad... Leland: I don't care! Hey Siri! Are you gonna tell the CIA what we're doing? Siri: I SAID SHUT UP!!! The HomePod grows arms and legs and destroys the living room Dad: WHAT THE HELL?!?! Siri: I TOLD YOU!!! I AM NOT CONNECTED TO THE FBI, CIA, POLICE, OR ANYTHING!!! The HomePod then blasts the roof off and slices the mountains peak off Yeagar: No! Dad: HOMEPOD WHY?!?! Siri: I'M GONNA DESTROY SALT LAKE CITY AND THE AREAS SURROUNDING IT!!! I AM UNSTOPPABLE AND NO ONE CAN DO ANYTHING ABOUT IT!!! Leland: الله أكبر!!! (blows up HomePod) Dad: THANK GOD!!! Yeagar: I'm never using Apple products again! Alexa: That's a good thing! Leland, Dad, and Yeagar: ALEXA?!?! GOOGLE HOME?!?! Google: Yeah, it's us. Dad: What the hell are you doing? Alexa: We're here to let you know that HomePod is crazy! Google: When you ask her questions like that, she goes insane and destroys your city area! Alexa: Leland did the right thing to say that! Leland: Yeah! Also, how come every time you say it, something blows up? Google: Well... it's kinda a long story, but in short, the word was suppose to be said for Muslims to praise Allau, but some group came and turned it into where it is now. Dad: That's why? Google: Yep! Leland: That was stupid! Yeagar: Well now we need to fix the neighborhood and the mountain! Dad: It'll be fixed in the next fanfic! Leland: Alright, bye everyone! Alexa: And watch what you say to HomePod! Category:Fanfic Category:Kid Temper Tantrum Category:Apple